Tag: Vietnam vet
Demonize Digitize or Democratize
In this post, I’m going to discuss how demonization and digitization can undermine democracy and what we need to do to restore democracy in the world. I know…two pretty big challenges for a short post, but here’s my best shot. When I went through Army Basic Training during the Vietnam War, many of the exercises were designed to demonize the Vietnamese people. When we stabbed our bayonets into dummies, we were instructed to yell, “Kill Read More
Systematic Sensitization
“Have we raised the threshold of horror so high that nothing short of a nuclear strike qualifies as a ‘real’ war? Are we to spend the rest of our lives in this state of high alert with guns pointed at each other’s heads and fingers trembling on the trigger?” ― Suzanna Arundhati Roy “The Cherokee used to fear that taking a photo would make them lose their souls. Over exposure and desensitization is pretty close Read More
Being Authentic in an Inauthentic World
“If you think dealing with issues like worthiness and authenticity and vulnerability are not worthwhile because there are more pressing issues, like the bottom line or attendance or standardized test scores, you are sadly, sadly mistaken. It underpins everything.” —Brené Brown OK, I’m embarrassed. In preparation for this post, I was searching for brainy quotes on authenticity and came across a full spectrum of pithy comments to profound insights. The most pithy and inauthentic quote Read More
My 50th
March 28th marked the 50th Anniversary of my first step into Army life in Vietnam and the first step out of the life I had always known. Serendipitously, I was having lunch that day with a colleague and friend whom I had known for 25 years but never understood his history with the war. As it turns out, he had an entirely different experience than I did. At 18 years old, he signed up for Read More
Parenting as Helping
“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” —Frederick Douglass
To be effective helpers, parents need to create the conditions and develop the skills required to make a positive difference in a child’s life. Based on my analysis of research conducted over the past 50 years, there are four conditions and four skills at the foundation of effective parenting.
The Menace of Mendacity
Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted with important matters. —Albert Einstein There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting. —Buddha Truth is not a trivial thing. Words matter. Being accurate requires curiosity, diligence, and rigor. I know that everyone has a different idea about what is truth. Much of the debate started when Pontius Pilate asked Read More
Marketing and Leadership
“When you are made a leader, you aren’t given a crown; you are given the responsibility to bring out the best in others.” —Jack Welch, Former CEO of General Electric There is an old adage that leaders are born not made. That myth became popular as people observed that most leaders had personality traits such as intelligence, charisma, attractive appearance, and confidence. I believe the truth is that effective leaders are typically born AND made, Read More
Disruption, Destruction, and Distraction
Independence Day 2017 “Power can be very addictive, and it can be corrosive. And it’s important for the media to call to account people who abuse their power, whether it be here or elsewhere.” —George W. Bush, 2017 Disruption can be for better for worse. Luckily for me, the two major disruptions in my life turned out for the better. In 1968, at age 23, I was sent to Vietnam as a soldier in Military Read More
Quests and Questions
As long as humans have told stories, we’ve shared tales about people going on quests. There is a long list of these tales about quests of one sort or another in history and in literature. Here are a few of the more famous quests. About 2,000 BC, Gilgamesh embraced the quest to find the secret to eternal life. He started out as a cruel despot who raped any women he fancied. After losing his best Read More
Bubbles, Beliefs, and Behaviors
I grew up in a bubble. It was a very common bubble for a lot of folks in our country: Mid-western, white, Christian, republican, working class, conservative, and rural. I had very little understanding about the lives of people outside my bubble and no awareness that I was even in a bubble.
My first bubble was burst in 1968 when I served in Vietnam with Army Intelligence.
Taming Tourette
When I was 30 years old, I was diagnosed as having Tourette syndrome (TS).
It was a huge relief to me to finally have a name for what had been tormenting me since I was about 13 years old. I was also depressed to know that I would be dealing with this neurological disorder for the rest of my life.
P and E Trump I and S
When I was a kid growing up in the 50s, my whole life revolved around kickball, basketball, running, climbing and hanging out with a neighborhood full of friends. My community consisted entirely of white, Christian, straight (as far as I knew) people. My world was physical and emotional. I measured success by goals scored and games won, and by how many friends I had in the In-Group.
Renewal
“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.” —Samuel Beckett Remember when air traffic was shut down in Europe from the eruption of E15 in Iceland? It was April, 2010, when Eyjafjallajökull (E15) erupted causing floods to rush down the rivers and requiring 800 people to be evacuated. The eruption was so explosive it caused air travel disruption in Europe for 6 days. More tragically, it buried the farms below it Read More
Sense and Sensitivity
March, 1968. I arrive in Saigon during the Tet offensive. I’m scared shitless. Having grown up in a rural, middle-class, Midwestern, small town, I’m not exactly used to hearing bullets whistling over my head. How in hell did I get into this hell and what am I supposed to be doing here?
Wonder and Wondering
In 1968, I met Stephen Williams at Fort Holabird, Maryland, where we were both enrolled in Army Spy School.
91 per day
Yup, it’s true. America is #1 in guns per capita and not even in the top 100 in murders per capita. The NRA would have you believe that there are no problems with guns. In fact, they argue that there is an inverse relationship between guns and murder—their message is essentially, “The more guns, the less murder.” The evidence for this argument is a single statistic, isolated from its context. Here are the facts: While it Read More
A Tribute to Old Friends and New
There’s a comfort in old friends. It’s a warm, easy comfort that is somehow different from the new. There’s no posing, pretending, or pandering. There’s no need for anything other than relaxing in the joy of connection and in being who you are. There is no fooling an old friend. There is a fullness and richness in conversations with old friends. The long histories and specific details of trials, triumphs, and tribulations enrich the re-telling Read More
Making Love
Don’t get excited. This is not a sex post or a guide to more exciting intercourse. Although I am a fan of great sex, this post deals with making love to life – in simple, everyday ways that don’t require expensive props or bundles of money. It’s simply an attitude and a choice. I should preface this post by saying that I was a participant in the “Make Love, Not War” movement in the 60s. Read More
Freedom
It’s a terrible feeling and a freeing experience to have your illusions destroyed. As I walked down the streets of Saigon and watched the army trucks full of terrified, tough kids purposely drive through mud puddles so that they could laugh gleefully as the brown, polluted water splashed randomly on the elegant, white, long dresses of the beautiful Vietnamese women I knew my view of the world had been irrevocably shaken. In the name of Read More
Being at Home in the Universe
An Internal Space or an External Refuge At my older daughter’s wedding, she sang the song, “Feels Like Home to Me” to her husband. It struck me that we are all searching for a sense of home in our lives and I was so grateful that she had found a man with whom she felt at home. Her beautiful voice filled the reception hall and my hope for everyone there was that they felt, in Read More