“Religion is for people who are scared to go to hell. Spirituality is for people who have already been.” —Bonnie Raitt
“Spirituality is meant to take us beyond our tribal identity into a domain of awareness that is more universal.” —Deepak Chopra
My wife and I (and our dog, Henri) recently spent 38 hours driving from San Diego, California to Traverse City, Michigan. We didn’t want to put 10-year old Henri in the underbelly of a plane and make him suffer the trauma of transportation and transfers. Thus, he quietly slept in the back seat of the car while we navigated the potholes and pitfalls that traveling presents. I’m glad to report that Henri arrived in Traverse City rested and relaxed while I arrived stressed and spent. My wife knitted the entire way, so I’m not sure she realized we even made the trip.
On the plus side, we listened to about 30 podcasts by Krista Tippett, David Axelrod, and Malcolm Gladwell—all of which were stimulating and thought provoking. And thus, after recovering from the trip, I had lots of material to process and post.
The main theme piquing my interest during this podcast tour had to do with the role of spirituality and religion in our lives.
Krista Tippett’s podcast, “On Being,” is the gold standard on this topic. If you haven’t listened to her, I highly recommend the experience. And you don’t need to go on a 38-hour road trip to do it.
These podcasts, however, represent only one source of inspiration for this post.
I had just finished the TV documentary, Wild Wild Country, that traced the evolution and devolution of a spiritual movement led by Bagwhan Shree Rajneesh, aka Osho, a guru who relocated his community from Pune, India to Antelope, Oregon.
Please see my recent post, “Genius,” for more information on the founding and fragmentation of that community and the issues it raised concerning spirituality.
These recent sources of input were simply toppings on the cake that I’ve been baking for over 50 years on the differences between spirituality and religion.
My slow-cooked cake is baked with ingredients from Gurdjieff, Taoism, Buddhism, Gnosticism, Sufism, the Kabbalah, and many highly-evolved mystics I’ve had the privilege of knowing.
So, I don’t enter this treacherous terrain uninformed. I also don’t claim to have the answer to the questions that haunt most inquiring humans. I simply have observations and questions.
So, after all this reading, listening, watching, thinking, processing, and writing I have come to the conclusion (at this point in my life) that almost all of spiritual literature and experiences are aimed at being awake, free, and joyful.
Most institutionalized religions, on the other hand, are aimed at just the opposite, i.e. leaving people numbed and asleep (unawake), controlled and trapped (unfree), and guilty and self-loathing (unjoyful). There you have it. Let me explain. And, to be fair, I will give a shout out to religion at the end.
Being awake means to marvel at the wonder and mystery of the world as well as to be conscious of the doubt, depression, and devastation we may feel at times.
It is to be astonished by the intensity and possibility of life as well as the ever-present reality of death. Being awake is more about experiencing “THIS” than describing “that.”
It is more about wrestling with challenging questions than resting with simplistic answers.
Being awake means to witness impartially and objectively who we are in each moment and who we might become.
It is being conscious and mindful of each breath we take, each step we make, and each action we fake. Being awake means to stop long enough to experience the fullness of being alive and being responsible. I have learned in my meditation practice that the most powerful experiences of spiritual oneness come when I stop and notice THIS. I am here now. I am awake in this moment.
Being free means opening to newness and possibility.
It means not being victimized by impulsive reactions, not being trapped by cultural constraints, not being limited by religious doctrine, not being defined by corporate norms.
Being free means opening the boundaries of our thinking and emotions. It means throwing off the shackles of our negative thoughts and conditioned habits.
Being free means that fear no longer controls us, beliefs no longer blind us, inner voices no longer condemn us.
It means giving ourselves permission to question the rituals, traditions and conventions that limit us and make us feel “not enough.”
And yet, having this freedom does not come without risks.
There are reasons societies have established rules of order, that religions have created dogma to dictate behavior, that nations have committed to rules of engagement, that individuals have defined boundaries and beliefs.
What we saw in Wild Wild Country was freedom run amok. The questions surrounding freedom always revolve around: Where is the line? Who decides when the line is crossed? What are the consequences for crossing the line? How do we respond when our lines are crossed?
Yes, freedom entertains many possibilities, but it raises even more questions.
Being joyful meaning relishing our sense of belongingness. It means experiencing the love and compassion that give meaning to life. Being joyful brings a radiating fullness, an integrated wholeness, and a real sense of being alive and well.
If you want to witness joyfulness, watch children play in the sand, dig in the dirt, laugh with uninhabited bliss, roll on the ground with each other, run down the steps, jump in your arms, give you a big hug.
Being joyful comes from loving yourself, loving others, and loving Nature. It comes from being seen, being heard, being affirmed, being loved, and being held dearly, tenderly, gently, and genuinely.
Thus, for me, being spiritual means being awake, free, and joyful.
And yet, after all these years of making effort toward those aims, I still feel myself falling asleep, feeling constrained, and being down more than I would like.
This spirituality stuff doesn’t come easy. There are no magic bullets. There are no easy answers. There is no compatibility between laziness and spiritual growth. Perhaps that explains why more people prefer religious communities to spiritual communities. And, that’s the other challenge. Communities are essential for spiritual growth—it’s hard to go it alone, and it’s even harder to find compatible communities.
Still, I would rather pursue the speculative, spiritual path than the routinized, religious route. I’m afraid that most religions are designed to keep us asleep with boring sermons, antiquated rituals, and damning dogma. I’m afraid most religions are more interested in keeping us in the flock than freeing us to form our own view of life. I’m afraid that most religions preach messages of sin and salvation that leave people feeling more gloomy than glad. That said, religions do serve the purpose of providing a sense of belonging, comfort, and community that have consoled billions of people over the ages. And many people in religious orders have made extraordinary efforts to serve the needs of the underserved.
The purpose of this post is not to issue a blanket condemnation on all religions. It is to raise the question of how to be more awake, free, and joyful independent of our religious or non-religious beliefs.
So, until I go on another road trip, this missive serves to share my current views on spirituality and religion. Meanwhile, Henri is still content snoring in the corner. And my wife just returned from yoga—she really does do a whole lot more than knit.
In conclusion, however we pursue it, may our spirituality take us beyond our tribal and limiting identities into a more universal domain of awareness.
May we seek ways to be more awake, free, and joyful while discharging our responsibility to be responsible.
Also published on Medium.
Love it Ricky! As we’ve discussed, I didn’t appreciate spirituality until I joined AA (20 years today!). As for community, we drunks strive to share our “experience, strength and hope” as we follow the 12 steps -my favorite may be #11: “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God (as we understand Him), asking only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.” As you’ve heard me say, my higher power is the Cosmic Spirit of the Universe that you’ve convinced me exists! Ronny Donny
Thanks Ronny. AA gives its member a deeper connection to a higher purpose and a real sense of community. To me, spiritual health is all about deep connections and joyful communities.